Time with God

This past weekend, I was at a spiritual retreat. I was such a refreshing space to be in; surrounded by women who were sincere and determine to maximize their time in the presence of God. Now we all know that God is with us at all times, but sometimes there is a need to take some time alone to listen to God more than we talk. I decided before I left that it would be a time to reset with God. To repent for the things I felt were out of order in my life. I found myself swept away into a refresher class of his plans to do something greater in my life.

HE IS NOT LISTENING!!

As I said before, I went with repentance on my mind. God, I’ m sorry. I wanted to list all of the things I felt I had been doing wrong. God’s response both directly to my spirit and through others he directed to address me was “Let it all go. I have work for you to do.” But God, I’m trying to repent. God’s response, “I need you to focus on what I need you to do.” I said to him you are not listening to me. My loving God, finally let me know I could get it off chest but then we could talk about more important things. My wonderful God, who loves me more than I could or can truly imagine, helped me release the guilt and hurt I carried to him. And in his lap, I was relieved of deep seated pain that I couldn’t cry out or scream out or just ignore. But it was taken like someone lifting a stack of center blocks off my stomach.

LORD, I AM LISTENING!!

As we all do, I have returned to the daily challenges of life. Asking for protection, from even my poor choices. However, it is different. I am rejuvenated and humbled. I walk listening to hear his direction. I acknowledge and depend on instructions from the Holy Spirit like a Christian that just felt the presence of God for the first. Hear him saying to me, “Trust me baby. I will take care of you.” And in this space, I choose to do just that. TRUST HIM.